Happy Birthday to my 3 year old!

Jake is our little surprise baby. I guess "surprise" could be an understatement! For years, we were under the assumption that I wouldn't be able to have another child. My medical issues are under control, but the possibility of getting pregnant was still pretty slim. It took some time for me to come to terms with that, but I did, and we were cool.

December 2004: Jeff and I were celebrating our 10th wedding anniversary. We had decided to take a long weekend trip to Disneyworld by ourselves. Mom stayed at the house with Brendan, and we were off. As our gifts to ourselves, we bought annual passes to Disneyworld. We were planning to go again in March for Spring Break, so we would buy Brendan a pass then.

Jeff and I had so much fun exploring our favorite place! It was a very different trip without a kiddo with us. We missed him, but enjoyed spending time just the two of us.

Let's fast forward to January 2005... Due to my medical conditions, I wasn't very "regular" - so I would take a pregnancy test every once in a while just to be sure. My doctor had told me that it was highly UN-likely that I would ever get pregnant again, but there was always a VERY SLIM chance that I could. Well guess what? On January 4, 2005, I took a test and it was POSITIVE! I was half asleep, and had to blink a few times and shake my head in disbelief. And then I took another one. Same result. I couldn't believe it. By this point, I really didn't want another child. It had taken a long time for me to accept that I would have only one child, but I had done it. Now our world was being turned upside down. We were in shock.

Jeff was actually speechless! He did not say a word to me the whole drive in to work that morning. It was around 9:30 or 10:00 that morning before he spoke to me again. He was just stressing out about the whole thing! His biggest concern was the money issue. Obviously, it would cost more to have another kid. We just weren't prepared for that. Looking back on it now, I really feel guilty that I felt so bad about it. It didn't take long though to start getting excited about having another little person in our family. We would figure out the money thing somehow. In the grand scheme of things, the money was a tiny little part. We were having a baby!

The funny part about finding out we were going to have another child was discovering when he was conceived. I found a calculator online and put in my due date. The date of conception turned out to be December 4, 2004! Hmmm... That happens to be that weekend we were in Disneyworld! Jeff liked to say that Disneyworld was not only the "Happiest Place on Earth", but also the most fertile!

We waited a few weeks before we told Brendan about it. I wasn't sure how he would handle it, but he was great! He was excited about it, but told me that he wouldn't change any diapers!

August 22, 2005: We show up at the hospital at 9:00 to have a scheduled c-section at 10:00. We ran into several delays, and finally Jake was born at 3:28pm. I was awake for his delivery (unlike Brendan's), and there was some pain!! I remember the anestesiologist telling me that as soon as the doctors got him out, she'd give me the "good stuff". And she did! I heard him cry and then I fell asleep for just a few minutes. I was wheeled into recovery and then my room. One of our friends had picked up Brendan from school and brought him to the hospital. He was excited to meet his brother, but didn't get to that day.

Jake had a minor problem with his heart, so there were several hours after his birth that were spent running tests. They had called in the pediatrician-on-call to come in and check him out, but he didn't arrive until around 2am. I didn't get to see my baby until after that! AND, the worst part of it was that none of the nurses would tell me WHY I couldn't see him. It was awful! I was so upset after I found out the truth about what was going on that night, and I talked to my doctor about it. She spoke to the head nurse and then she came to see me. I let her know how stressful the situation was and that I hoped this didn't have to happen to any other mother!

I'm not a doctor, but this is what I know about what was going on with Jake's heart... There is a valve in the heart that typically gets closed during birth (it's supposed to). The pressure of going through the birth canal usually forces this to happen. Sometimes, with c-section babies, the valve doesn't close properly. Most of the time - at some point after the birth - it will close on it's own. In rare cases, the baby may need surgery to close it. Luckily for Jake, the valve closed on it's own within a day. In the end, he was perfectly healthy and we went home on time and he's had no other issues.

What an amazing little baby we had! He was adorable and so sweet. Brendan was so good with him. He was a proud big brother!

I am so blessed to have my two boys in my life. I love them both so very much and I can't imagine what life would be like without BOTH of them here with us. Life is good!

I love you Jake! You're 3!! What a big boy! Now, let's talk about potty training... :)

Frustration

I hate credit card companies. They lure you in, and then they screw you over. They start young, too! They came after me in college. I was young, and liked to have fun. (typical 18-year-old!) I didn't give too much thought to having to pay back what I "borrowed". But anyway... I digress. Let's fast forward a few years - to present day.

We have credit card debt. A lot of it. Too much, I know. A couple of months ago, we realized just how bad it really was and made a vow to change it. Easier said than done. I was looking through statements one month and noticed that a certain bank had raised our interest rates - quite a bit!! Almost double - to be more precise. What the hell??? Why would they do that? Because they can. This happened to 3 of our cards - and they all happen to be from the same bank. When I called to question this move, I was informed that it's because they noticed that we had too much debt (in their not-so-humble opinion). Well, no shit! I'm fully aware that we have too much debt. We are striving to lower it as we speak, I tell the guy. His response was that the bank was doing this to everyone, meaning - reviewing accounts and adjusting things as they saw fit. How nice of them.

I ask the guy how I could be penalized like this when I've ALWAYS paid on time? I've ALWAYS paid at least the minimum required. I've NEVER gone over my limit. He said that those things had nothing to do with it. Well, why the hell not???? Those good things should count for something, shouldn't they? If I had consistently been paying late, then of course I would deserve a penalty of some sort. If I couldn't pay the minimum required, I should be penalized. I know they charge over-the-limit fees, and I would understand being penalized for that. But NONE OF THESE APPLY in our case! We've played by the rules, and now we're being screwed over. AND WE'VE DONE NOTHING WRONG!!! YOU (the bank) offered us credit. YOU approved us when we applied for credit. YOU increased our spending limits - BECAUSE WE WERE SUCH VALUED CUSTOMERS. And now, because YOU have determined that we have too much debt (that YOU allowed us to have), you are penalizing us. Thanks a lot. I'm so glad that we chose to do business with you.

So, I ask the guy if anything can be done about this. I point out once again all the things that we've done right regarding our accounts (everything). And I ask him to explain to me once again all the things that we've done wrong (nothing). He agrees that we've done nothing wrong - except to actually USE the credit that was given us. How is this wrong again?? He doesn't have an answer for me. He tells me that the only thing we can do is "freeze" our accounts and they'll lower the interest rates. "Freezing" the accounts means that we can't use them. Well we can, but the first time we do, they'll jack the interest back up again. He said that as soon as we get to a zero balance, they'll be willing to "negotiate" with us for a low rate and unfreeze the account. Wow. Thanks for working with me!

I let the guy know how I feel about this whole deal, and he just listens. I know that it wasn't actually HIM that did this, but he's representing that company, and he got an earful that day from me. I point out to him that while I'm fully aware of the fact that I have too much debt, raising my interest rates (and subsequently the minimum payments) is only going to make it that much harder to actually pay the bills! I ask what sense this makes... ?? He says he understands, but there's nothing else he can do. Well, great. I tell him to freeze 2 of the accounts for now. Times are REALLY hard right now, and I feel like I need the flexibility to keep that 3rd card available if I need it. So it's done. 2 cards are "frozen" with somewhat reasonable interest rates. The 3rd card is still "un-frozen" and available for use. Of course, the interest rate is an un-Godly rate of 24.99%, but what can I do?

So, where are we? Since April, we've been living with those 2 cards frozen and the 3rd with the ridiculous interest. Fine, we're struggling - but hanging in there. Then, last week, we get some lovely mail from this bank. They've decided to LOWER our credit limits on 2 of the accounts! The one that we left un-frozen was lowered by about $1000, and one that was frozen was lowered by about $4000. They had determined that we carried too much credit (in general) and felt it was in their best interest to lower our limits. What amazes me is that I haven't used that one frozen card (either frozen one actually) since April, and they lower our limit by $4000!! I haven't charged anything on it in months, but yet it's in their best interest to lower it?? Please!!

And the hits just keep on comin'...